Friday felt like the end of a long week. Six days of training in a row, made heavier by the rain, and today it nearly proved a bridge too far.
The morning session flew by with a smile, but it felt as though someone had pulled the handbrake and dragged my performance to a grinding halt. The day lacked flow. It still had its highlights.
One was lunch with two old friends of my coach, a husband and wife, both seasoned teachers in the Tai Chi world. It was good to slip the invisible grip of the school for an hour and sit with two people who have nothing to prove. I listened while they told stories of a life spent travelling, teaching and researching their latest book, a publication that takes a scientific approach to the so-called “wise” practices so many of us undertake.
Their view of the world felt limitless, and in its light I could see the walls I’ve built from my own beliefs. Beliefs and opinions that may be the very thing standing between me and the next step on this personal journey.
That’s the odd part of this path. I’ve never felt in control of any step of it. I make the decision, and once it’s made, the wheels are already turning, and I’m left like a surfer riding a wave blindfolded.
The evening ended with a pleasant surprise, a couple of drinks with friends. It was the kind of night that asked for slow conversation and a late walk home, and I enjoyed both. After six long days, I think I needed them.
One week of ups and downs is behind me, and what waits ahead is unknown. The kind of future that makes some people nervous, yet simply makes me curious.